Does your child fear going to school or team practice? Is your child picked-on or teased by other kids? Bullying is a growing problem in our country. It can cause the victim hurt feelings, emotional damage, depression and in some cases suicide. Would you like to protect your child/teen from being victimized by a bully? If so, then read on.

The psychological fact is that inwardly all bullies are cowards. Why? Something happened to them at an early age damaging their self-esteem and self-confidence. Bullies are extremely vulnerable and unhappy with who they are. Subconsciously they are miserable! Inwardly bullies are frightened, insecure, simple-minded lost souls. Bullies are in a constant pursuit to feel better about themselves. So what do bullies do to eliminate these horrible feelings of insecurity and worthlessness? Unfortunately their "quick fix" is to hurt someone they perceive is weaker than they are. Bullies receive a quick ego boost by picking on the weak. Having power over another gives bullies a false feeling of importance. Worst, if their victim demonstrates fear, the bully receives many subconscious rewards of power and most of all significance. Fear reinforces bully behavior.

While some bully-prevention rests with the school system and its policies, there are several things we can do as parents to make our child/teen less of a target for bullies. Remember bullies are very insecure and fearful individuals, therefore they will choose victims they believe will not fight back. I'm convinced that your children/teen can become a "target" for bullies simply by the way they use their body language. Bullies can spot a "push-over" in the same manner a lion can spot a weakness in a large herd of zebra. It's the same thing! Again, they pick on the weak; because they assume they won't fight back.

Some of the criteria bullies use to target their victims lies in how the victims carries themselves. Confident, tall, secure body language usually frightens bullies since the intended victim is projecting an aura of assuredness.

Affirmations & Hypnosis:

Professional or clinical hypnotherapy was approved by the A.M.A in 1958. It is an amazing tool we parents can use to help our kids project greater confidence and assertiveness levels. In the Kids in Trance Program we teach parents -4- specific steps to help our kids become less of a target for bullies. It is by changing our child's inner perception of themselves that they can outwardly project the body language and confidence levels that will cause a bully to look elsewhere.

Here's what to do:

1. Have your child find a comfortable sitting position, close their eyes and take several slow, relaxing deep breaths. As they relax like this for a few minutes they will begin to enter a natural "daydream or hypnotic trance." This relaxed state or trance is the doorway to subconscious functioning and creating lasting change. In trance have them mentally review times when they felt totally confident. (Perhaps when they won a contest or received a good grade.) Have them recall how they stood, what their body posture was like, how they breathed and most of all how they were thinking at those peak moments. Have them reinforce these images repeatedly in full detail and color. These mental pictures will rewire their nervous system and create an outstanding level of self-confidence and personal satisfaction.

2. Have your child visualize themself as a person filled with high levels of self-confidence. Imagine doing things that a confident person would do. They can model or imitate people who exhibit large amounts of self-confidence. In their mind they can walk the way that person walks, breathe the way they breathe, talk the way they talk, carry themself in the same manner in which assured people carry themselves. Individuals who demonstrate high levels of self-confidence have a confident inner vision of themselves, and it is this vision that creates the "assured persona" displayed outwardly. These same images will penetrate your child's subconscious and create a similar outcome. This is a threat to bullies.

3. On a piece of paper, have your child write down all of their good points, positive traits and things they admire most about themself. They should spend as much time as possible on this. While they're in trance read the list to your child. Have your child review their list over and over again. This will reinforce the good qualities and help them to focus on them in greater detail. The more they focus on these special traits, the more dominant they will become in their personality. Remember bullies hate confident victims.

4. Before bed, have your child silently repeat some of the affirmations below. They are designed to create a more assertive body language, improve posture, enhance confidence, and heighten bravery. For maximum effectiveness this should be reinforced 3 times a week until the issue improves.

I am strong, confident and brave.
I make friends and help others.
I walk tall, confidently and proudly.
I maintain good eye contact.
I have an attractive pleasing personality.
I always walk away from trouble.
People's opinion of me leaves me feeling indifferent & calm.
I feel good about myself.
I am confident and brave in all situations.
I stand up for myself and others.
I project an aura of confidence and bravery.
Taking 3 slow, deep breaths relaxes me anytime, anywhere.

Remember there are many psychological differences between the assertive, passive and aggressive personalities. Passive kids violate their own rights and in doing so teach bullies how to further hurt them in the future. Aggressive kids violate other kid's rights. Assertive kids promote and uphold everyone's rights simultaneously. Assertiveness and confidence are tools that can bully-proof your child. They must demonstrate and wear their confidence like a "Bully-Proof Vest." I believe the information above can be of great benefit.

A very nice mother called me recently and reported how these strategies changed her teenage son's life. She said he was constantly being picked on and mocked because of his weight. From 8th grade all the way thru sophomore year in high school he dreaded going to school. She applied the strategies listed above throughout his summer vacation. She told me she noticed positive changes almost immediately. He lost weight over the summer and this dramatically boosted his self-esteem. He began to walk a little taller and more securely. When school started, he tried out for the football team and made it. He met his very first girlfriend and went on his very first date. However, the best part was the bullying and the mocking stopped completely. This amazing transformation made the mom extremely happy. As a parent how would you feel?

Remember our young children and teens are very impressionable and very open to the power of suggestion. That's why our hypnotherapeutic strategies are so effective. You can use this information to make dramatic, positive changes in your child that will last a lifetime. This type of body language, assertiveness and confidence can help them get into a good college and land an amazing job. Raising kids is a very challenging job; do we really need bullies to make the job more difficult?